Are the unemployed all scrounging scum?

Are the unemployed all scrounging scum?

Many people still believe that finding work is as simple as picking up the phone calling a company "Hello company.  I would like a job" "Excellent I'll find a position for you now" and then starting the next day. Is it really that easy?  Spoilers - Hell no.

You're Right 
Let's start with something we can agree on I'm sure that there's at least one person out there gaming the system, so they can live the life of luxury lazing about doing nothing all day on their £70 a week.  Truly the life of a king. 

if you cant tell i'm joking.  Let's look into the life of this scrounger.  They live with parents or a council  house surrounded by other council house residents (You can paint a picture of these neighbours however you like), because they don't have the money for their own place.  They don't hang out and do fun activities as what they are making is just enough to scrape by.  They spend a good chunk of their day looking for work, only to find the same jobs from the day before, that they've already applied for.  Do they apply again or do they venture even further into the depths of job sites to find something they haven't applied for?  Only to make tomorrows hunt that little bit harder.  And after a crap week of doing nothing but spending hours looking and applying to jobs you go to the job centre to be looked at with disgust from all the staff, get called over to the 1960's detective that has  a hunch that your the criminal their after.  No evidence, but who needs that. 
"I don't think you've been looking hard enough"
"What do you mean?  You can see that i've applied for all these jobs"
"Yes, but you also applied for this same job last week"
"That's because they put out a new ad."
"hhmmm.... Bull! Sanctioned!" then they grog and spit on your face
"Get out of my sight.  Scum!"
Or something along those lines.  
Are you really angry at the unemployed? really?  You're jealous of this 'care-free life'?  If anything these folk deserve pitty.  Their lives are pathetic.  No one dreams of that when they grow up.
"What would you like to be when you grow up Jimmy?"
"I want to be an unemployed bum!"
Now that we've established that this care-free life of bliss isn't all it's cracked up to be, let's look into finding work.

Minimum Wage
At first you apply for all your dream jobs, but as time goes on and you get rejection after rejection you lower your standards.  More and more each week until your left at the end of the night alone talking to the beached whale of lass, named minimum wage, hoping that she'll show you some pitty.  But she doesn't why?  because there's tons like you, putting there last drink down and crawling over to chat to her.  She believes she really is a beautiful princess and is pushing away all, but the absolute best.  
"You want to clean our bathrooms, without a degree?  Hahahaha!"
"Wait you're serious?  Why would we hire you to clean the bathrooms when Jim here has a masters in fine art, 4 years security experience (before damaging his leg) and chef experience?"
That's right even though they're advertised as 'No experience needed' folk with experience, skills and knowledge well above yours and even the boss of the company are applying for these jobs.  What chance do you have against them?

Applications
Finding work takes time.  You can search the high-street for anywhere 'looking for staff' print off C.V's and hand them in, only to be told by Carol at the checkouts.
"It's an online process now.  We don't accept C.V's"
So you head back home, get on the internet and apply online.  First you need to set up a username and password, find the job you want, upload your C.V, rewrite everything in your C.V in the boxes that follow, write a 500 word essay on why you'd like this minimum wage job without stating the only true reason 'To make money', fill in an hourlong questionnaire, to be finally greeted with an automated response of 'Sorry you have not been successful.  Better luck next time" best part of a day wasted, thanks.  And that's only 1 job, you need to apply for at least 3, every day.


Education
The only reasonable step forward is to educate yourself and that will hopefully lead to even better jobs than what you're currently looking at.  Whatever it may be - college, university, a short course to learn new skills ect. you push through, whilst still looking for work and signing on (whilst getting treated like lying scum every time.). Eventually you pass.  You're educated, you're on of the smart ones, so you start applying for jobs in that field.  But so does everyone else in your class and unfortunately, with only 3 jobs going you and most of that class are left still looking for work.  So it's back to applying for minimum wage work.
Result! You've been invited for an interview.  Unfortunately despite being a great match they decided to hire someone else.  This happens for every job you're luck enough to get an interview for.

Micky Mouse Club
'It's been months are you're still signing on.  Seems fishy.  We're sending you to a few work courses' These courses teach you how to perfect your C.V,, find and apply for jobs, and boost your interview skills.  I forgot the real name, but i like to call them Micky Mouse courses, because at the end of the day if you work really hard they'll give you a Micky Mouse sticker (seriously i was given a book that the'd stamp with a happy, neutral or sad sticker for the job center staff to check). 
These courses where useless.  You'd touch up your C.V in one class, only to recve no acceptance letters from jobs and the next class the declare that that C.V is rubbish and you need to write a new one.  So you spend that class writing a new one, get a happy Mick Mouse sticker, get no replies off jobs, have the job centre laugh at how pathetic you, you're happy Micky Mouse sticker and your C.V are and the next leader of the class rip the C.V to shreds and have you write a new one.

Location
You see on the news and in the papers that 'There's more job opportunities than unemployed', but that can't be true can it?  You've been trying for over a year now.  There's no jobs.
Oh wait, maybe they are right.  There's jobs outside your small city.  You should just move and then you can get one.  How do you get a house without a job though?  Apply and if you get it move.  genius.  So you apply and are lucky enough to be graced with an interview.  That means booking a train and maybe even a hotel if its far enough, That's a weeks pay gone, but it'll all be worth it once you've got the job.  Finally you get the job, they want you to star tomorrow.  But you can't you don't even have a house there yet.  They're in a ruch, sadly they can't wait for you.  A weeks pay down the drain.  Then the Job Centres 60's detective laughs in you're face.
"Hahahaha! what made you think that getting a train and booking a hotel for a minimum wage job was a smart idea?  Are you mentally retarded? hahaha!"

Part-Time
You might be a parent or a carer.  You can't spend all day working, you have more important things to attend to.  Does the Job Center 1960's detective sympathise with you? Of course they bloody well don't.  If you can't find part time you better be applying for full time, screw your dependents they'll just have to learn to survive without you.  And if you thought it was hard finding a job, imagine reducing that number down again to only part time, whilst competing with every other person that's reduced their search options down to part time.  Let's hope they dont have 3 happy Micky Mouse stickers in their books.

Mental Health
How do you think you'd feel if this was your life....
£70 a week to live off of.
Applying for jobs under you skill/Knowledge level and getting rejected, over and over again.
Competing against those far more skilled and knowledgeable than you.
Educating yourself whilst still looking and applying for work, going on Micky Mouse courses and getting treated like scum off the Job Centre week after week.
Working on a new C.V week after week, even though nothings changed.

And after all that finding work only to be treated like crap off your boss, the owners nephew who doesn't have a clue how to run things.  You can't quit, because you need the money and you know how hard it is to find work, but if you stay much longer you're likely to snap and kill someone.

Ahh... the life of the unemployed king.  Glorious. 


Back to blog

Leave a comment

Please note, comments need to be approved before they are published.