Conspiracy
Photos of muslim culture plaster John Pauls office. Famous well loved and respected Muslims stood out in this display - Muhammad Ali, the greatest boxer of all time. Nobel prize winner Malala Yousafza and the top G himself - Andrew Tait. John Paul paces up and down whilst Jesus watches. "Sure there's some bad ones" Pointing to President Barack Hussein Obama (Who isn't even muslim. But he was black and that's close enough for our hero's) "But most of them are great people." He said as his hand sweeps across the wall showing all the newspaper clippings of charity done in the name of Islam. Jesus scowls "ggrr..." John Paul continues "You enjoyed your pasta yesterday. That was made by Muslims" Jesus was taken aback. He almost fell out of his seat. All colour left him, then he slowly took his two fingers. Raised them up and shoved them down his throat making himself throw up all over John Pauls office. "Are you f**king insane?" Jesus screams "Let me tell you how they treated me. Jesus Christ!". Jesus stands up and retells of his ordeal.
"It was a beautiful sunny day. Birds were chirping their sweet melodies. Flowers, every colour of the rainbow covered the hillside and and the pastel blue sky was as peaceful as a buddhist having his first summers pint with the lads. All was good in the world. I was walking down the street. Enjoying my wine. When suddenly, out of nowhere, one of these muslamiks jamp (Scottish for jumped) out of nowhere screaming "Give me you're wine or i'll rip your head off" then he pulled out this huge blade so i ran." Jesus wipes a tear from his eye "He then called on his mates. Unfortunately I tripped and fell. Smashing my wine. They weren't happy about that so they kicked and beat me. Even the children joined in. I blanked out and woke up naked. Blood everywhere. Im not sure how i got ma robe and sandals, maybe it was magic. Then i met you. We met for a reason. You're gonna help me take em all down."
John Paul is sat in the corner weeping "How dare they do this to my Lord and saviour. I'll make sure they all pay for this. Mark my words." John Paul pulls himself together. "We need to figure out why so many are still pretending to be nice and stop them before it's too late" John Paul clenches his fist whilst Jesus smiles with pride. "I can't do this alone though. I'm just not that smart, but i know someone who is. Ma boy. (His choirboy to be exact) Francis"